Thursday, October 17, 2013

Until it wasn't...

I’m 17 days into my 30-day Nutritional Reset. Week 1 – flawlessly executed. Yay Me! Survived Carb Flu. Survived a birthday party (it did help that it was at Chunky Cheese). Week 2 – I was rocking by this week. I felt better. I felt strong. I felt like this was going to be pretty easy. Until it wasn’t.

Still unsure how it all unraveled so quickly, but in a blur of carbohydrates and sugar I downed a piece of my daughter’s birthday cake. What ensued over the next few hours was a crazy woman with an “F-it” attitude (note to mom: Let’s just agree the “F” stands for Forget – so don’t ground me. I’m almost 40.) Within hours I had agreed to pizza, and the unopened wine I was so proud off was completely drained. Then neighbors arrived with more wine! Woohoo! Life was good. Until it wasn’t.

The next-day remorse was ridiculous. I was so guilt-ridden about it all – that I moped, whined and berated myself all day. Not to mention felt like crap, and with my rosacea turned up to 11 - I looked completely sunburned. Nice. It’s an odd feeling to direct your anger and disappointment inward. I didn’t let anyone else down. I only let myself down. So I can’t report Week 2 as flawless. Made it right to the finish line of the week and tripped head over heels with bad decisions. Sunday was a bad day for me. Until it wasn’t. 

I was tired of being mad at myself. I built the food plan for the week, refreshed the groceries. And yes, I threw away the remaining birthday cake. Week 3 – not over yet, but in an odd way I’m more steeled for success after flubbing up last week. Somehow through failure, I’m more determined to see this through now then I was in Week 1 and Week 2 (minus the 5 hours of carb/sugar debauchery). This Nutritional Reset has been an interesting experiment about my relationship with food. I’m not a foodie by nature. I like quick, cheap and apparently dirty food. I like things that come in boxes, brown bags and from drive-up windows. I like not thinking about food every minute of the day. But that lazy approach to eating is what resulted in being overweight. That approach is also why I stalled out on my fitness goals. The Lazy Gal’s diet was acceptable for me. Until it wasn’t. 

This experience has forced me to plan, think, read, prepare and most of all cook. I know pretty much what I’m eating and when and what has to occur to get it prepared. I read recipes now, save tips on extracting natural sugar from stevia leaves, and feel I’m “one good idea” away from starting a Pintrest page (something I wholeheartedly have resisted for a long time). The Nutritional Reset has turned me into a reluctant foodie, but each meal, snack and drink is thought out, planned, researched, shopped for and prepared. I have always been an anti-foodie because it all seemed like it was too much work. Until it wasn’t. 

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